How to let go of your negative emotions? – Part 2
Hi! Hope you have read the first part of How to let go of your negative emotions. In case you haven’t please click on the link to read it.
Let’s continue with the next three ways…
3.Gratitude: I love this method because what greater feeling can we go through in life than being grateful. Now you can choose to go through life in a state of anger, frustration, disappointment, sadness, fear but what if you could live a life of gratitude. I have shared about how state of mind is so important for us in this video “Success is a State of Mind” . We are not even talking about what you need to give (which is important) but a state of gratitude for all the things that you have in life so far. When you are grateful for the things that you have in your life, the universe will give you more.
Process: Start with a relaxed environment again, you can do the guided relaxation and meditation exercise to set the stage right. Then look at the incident and feel grateful towards it. I know it is challenging. The questions that normally comes up is why me? Why did this happen to me? Why do I deserve this life? etc… Now by channelizing or focusing on the negative side it will only make us to feel even more negative and demotivated. Try to show complete gratitude to the universe, the people involved and the situation. These people are not bad, all have good in them, at that point of time they have reacted in that manner for whatever they were going through. Look at what is the lesson you are supposed to learn from that experience. This incident has happened in your life for you to learn a lesson. What is the lesson you are supposed to learn and once you figure that out thank the universe again for bringing these people and situations into your life for teaching you this lesson. This lesson might have come to you many times in many formats at different intensities but you chose to learn it now through this particular reflecting and gratitude process.
It could be difficult at the beginning to show gratitude, I can understand , it is okay just start with a small incident which has affected you- show gratitude to it, overcome it, build your gratitude muscle and then go to the one that is troubling you.
4.Being Vulnerable: We are taught not to express our emotions, especially the ones that are negative. When we feel like crying and then cry, it is considered as weakness. That they are not capable to handle stress or they are not mentally strong. It is not true. Expressing your emotions is a strength. Many people cannot express and they hold it in inside and we know the negative consequences of that.
Expressing your emotions is important but how you express might need to be improved. Let’s say you are angry with someone, you need to express the fact that you are angry but not by hitting them or shouting at them using vulgar words. In order to express anger in a manner which does not affect the other person, practice any of the techniques we discussed in our blogs like writing, gratitude or meditation. Then when you are no longer influenced completely by anger but with more awareness, you talk to the person and express how you felt, how the person made you feel and sort out the issue. Now when you speak to the person you might be flooded with emotions like crying, it is okay to go through that because you are releasing it.
When people tend to cry, people immediately say something to make them stop crying. They tend to distract them away from the feeling. It is important for people to cry and release the negative pent up emotion. If they don’t release it, then it will burst one day which is very harmful. They might end up taking an action in an angry or frustrated state of mind which might not be the right thing to do. So it is okay to feel vulnerable. It is okay to look at situations which have caused us more pain, feel the sadness again and cry over it. You reflect, cry over it, let go of it and move on. It is not to be done for the rest of your life. Remember being vulnerable for the right reasons at the right time is a strength.
5.Speak it out: I would say the easiest of all options to let go of pent up emotions is to speak it out. People have a habit of holding it inside and never letting go of it. People tend to think about the problem, keeping running it in their minds for hours together, feel bad about it, run through umpteen number of negative emotions. They just don’t release it out as they are not very aware of how much stress and negative hormones they are releasing into their body because of this.
One of the easiest way to release your emotions is to speak to some friend of yours instead of speaking to yourself. Many people as a process without awareness might already be doing it. Some of you might find it very difficult to talk about it to other people.
Process: One of the most important point to take note is the person whom you are sharing it with. This person should be a good guide, a person who might not judge you or take advantage of your emotions. A well experienced person who has seen challenges himself and is willing to give you a heartfelt hearing. I suggest after you find such person you just speak your heart out to them, explain the challenges openly. Don’t bore them multiple times with your same story again and again. When you share, share it with awareness so that you can feel the release.
Most of the times just as you share the story you will be able to feel the release of energy from your body. You feel more relaxed and calm. Each one of us will definitely have one friend who would be willing to listen to what you say. This person shouldn’t be adding more oil to your fire but helping you to release your tension. If you don’t find a person like that then it is high time you build your relationship network. May be you have been focusing too much about problems and not really opened up yourself to find beautiful friendships. All the tension you are having could also be because you are not having any friends to share and care.
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Ganesh Kumar S
EQ Ignitor | Emotional Intelligence Trainer | Entrepreneur | Life Coach | Author
A very useful Article..thanks for sharing it 🙂